(My valentine roses)
As said last week, I would quote another paragraph from our book, but this time a piece that my husband René has written to keep things in balance.
It is a short piece but I hope that it helps us crawl behind the eyeballs of our husbands to see things from their perspective..
We are all different and have our own temperements and characters, but some basic needs in men and women seem to be universal.
When God began to think about the woman, His words were: "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper meet for him." These last words 'meet for him' literally mean 'as one standing in front of him, his equal'. This is another significant indication that, as far as personal value is concerned, for God men and women are 'standing in front of each other', or, are each others equals.
Here's where things can become a little tricky, and where the skilful work of the enemy comes into play. In one way or the other, the devil has managed to link the concept of helper with the concept of being inferior, and, the other way around, the fact of being served as automatically being superior. So multitudes of women have started to believe that the fact that they are a helper means they are just a little less than males. The other way around, scores of men, consciously or subconsciously, think that the fact that they are male, means they are in fact a little superior, which has never been God's thought and intention at all! Later, we'll very clearly and unambiguously prove that God, from the beginning onwards, created man and woman equal, as far as their personal value is concerned. We are dealing here with a difference in position and function, which isn’t the same as a difference in personal value.
Stronger even: the word for 'helper' is 'Ezer' which also can mean 'to save'. In the same way that God was a Helper and Salvation for Israel, the woman 'saves' the man from his loneliness.
And how true this is! Before Jacqueline received her revelation about how God wanted her to be my helper, showing her this goes beyond being on the Advisory Committee only, I sometimes felt so very lonely! Yes, I knew she was with me, loved me, and was loyal to me, but I just couldn't get away from the overwhelming feeling of inner loneliness I often had. Every time I was in some sort of problem, struggling not to drown, Jacqueline would take her place on the sideline, throwing counsel at me about how to get out of the water, hoping I would grab the lifeline she suggested and pull myself out. What I really needed was her being right next to me to face the battle together! Now, it isn't the same anymore, thank God! Yes, she does give me advice from time to time, but only when I feel her arms around me! Loneliness, be gone! Intimacy, come in!
I so hope these words speak for themselves! I know my husband is not waiting for my advice, he probably knows the solution better than me - he is looking for intimacy!